And when it hurts, well, it hurts.

I'm sitting here in bed, upset that I'm not asleep because I have to wake up at 7 tomorrow....fantastic. But that's not the only thing I'm upset about, hurt would be more appropriate.


Subhanallah. Sometimes you can [try to] prepare yourself for a bad situation. For instance, you know that after Sunday comes Monday inshallah. I've had 21 years worth of Mondays--but for some reason I still hate those mornings. I never sleep enough on Sunday night, I am cranky, and I always wish we could rewind the last 48 hours. But logically speaking, shouldn't I be used to that by now?


Now I'm in a similar situation. The day my friend leaves for Saudi Arabia is here. I've had a few weeks to 'prepare' myself. I thought I was doing great...until right now. I'm a total wreck. I have a heavy feeling in my chest. It won't go away. My sighs are frequent. Praying helps, alhamdulilah. And I know that everything happens for a reason--I don't know all of His reasons but I know they're there. La hawla wala quwwata ila bi Allah [there is no power or strength except through Allâh SWT].


Unfortunately right now this situation still sucks. And inshallah this will all get easier, and with His help I will get through this (probably even quicker than I thought). A few weeks/months from now this situation may even seem silly. But right now, at this very moment, it still hurts.


And when it hurts, it will be okay IA.


Sincerely,


A Muslimah